Well, I only thought my life couldn’t get any worst. Then Christmas Day of 2019 happened and once again I find myself barely able to do things that are required to minimally function. I do have a hard time shouldering 100% of the blame though. I needed to write a story. I’m sorry world that its Christmas Day, give me my wifi.
I have a hard time working at home, too many distractions. I usually go to my top spot Cups, but Ive been encouraged by Queen Bee to venture out to other writing spots in search of inspiration. Christmas Day seemed like the perfect time for me to spread my baby-bird wings and learn to fly. As we will soon find out, I fell flat on my beak.
The easiest choice of spots was Starbucks, but it was closed. I then saw something interesting. There was McDonald’s; people were coming in and out. I could go there to the McCafe. I like McCafe more than McDonalds; I’m modern. I want a mango smoothie not a Big Mac. More importantly, I knew McCafe had free Wifi. This was a perk of going into a greasy smelling McDonalds and pretending it was an espresso shop.
After ordering my smoothie, I went to open my bag and start writing. I am usually keen on keeping my tech charged. I use it a lot at random times; life moves much more efficiently when my batteries don’t need charging. Well, on Christmas Eve night I was so pumped about Santa coming that I forgot to charge my phone. When I arrived for brunch over at Queen Bee’s I was at a strong 7%. Sadly, when I got my computer opened it up there was my battery percentage, struggling at 13%. This wasn’t going to work for me. My phone had already died one time earlier in the morning, and I needed my computer to help charge my phone now. I looked all around and could not find a plug-in next to any booth or table. I then saw two that were within reach of a couple of bar seats. I thought that this bar must be the primetime spot of McCafe. Boy, was I wrong. I could not even finagle my charger in well enough to stay plugged-in to the outlet. It kept falling out. Like this would have mattered anyway, even when I held the charger into the outlet, my computer received no power.
I had no idea what to do. I made two laps around the restaurant searching for another outlet. I then asked two workers if they knew where I could find electricity. They pointed to where my computer was sitting. I told them that those did not work. They told that they did work. So I took a sip of my smoothie and stared blankly back at them waiting for a punchline that wouldn’t arrive for several more hours.
No where else in Clinton was opened, and my brain was seeing the world in stories at that moment. I needed to get to typing, quickly. My only option was another McCafe about 10 minutes away.
Many of you know Jackson is a crazy place. Not long ago, I was on my way to school, when a car pulled out in front of me. I heard a noise and looked behind the car and saw a man chasing and shooting a pistol at it. I was about 25 feet away. About 3 rounds in he stopped, and he and I had eye contact. I hit reverse so fast my tires smoked. I was freaking out; pretty sure my next stop was heaven. He must’ve know I wasn’t a cooperating witness, because after I hit reverse, he unloaded the rest of his clip in the direction of the car. I drove off and never looked back. It looked like a drug deal gone wrong. I don’t do drugs, so it had nothing to do with me.
The McCafe I was on my way to was in a similar part of town as my near death experience. I walked in carrying the same smoothie I had ordered during my first stop. There was no way I was paying for anything else. At least, I didn’t plan on it. I immediately found a working outlet and knew things were about to turn in my favor. Victory was imminent. Once again, boy was i wrong.
I had a really hard time concentrating. There was a young fellow taking his break from work being almost accosted by an older dude. This older guy must be really lucky because he said over and over that any lottery ticket he scratches off automatically becomes a winner. I’m not sure how this works, but this guy was making himself out to be either King Midas or the Golden Goose. I wasn’t sure which. He told the young cat that for a small percentage any winnings from his magic touch, he would scratch as many lottery tickets as the young guy would buy. Whether he was lucky or not, this old dude was smart; he was taking very little risk to scratch off someone else’s lotto ticket that the other person paid for.
The lottery in Mississippi has been a hotly debated topic for years. Well, it just became legal, and boy, do we have some players in the 601. Lines in gas stations are ridiculous now. The tickets are impossible to read, so people are constantly having to have tickets checked and any winnings turned into more tickets. Rarely does anyone actually take cash for a winning ticket. It’s crazy to me, because you almost have to have a Calculus degree to be able to read the ticket, but you also have to be dumb enough to sit there and give away free money to the State Lottery Commission. I will be doing further research, especially when the Power Ball gets up to about half a billion dollars.
Eventually, the man realized no one was going to give him money to scratch their tickets and moved on. This allowed me to get to writing. I got a a pretty good flow going until another fellow came and sat down and just looked at me. Since Zone A2 in Hinds County Detention Center, I always sit with my back to the wall and my face to the door. This guy looking at me was making me feel some type of way. I took my earbuds out and asked if I could help him. Unsurprisingly, he said yes.
All I have to do in a situation like this to get the full story is drop a line to whomever I am talking to about my wild days in lock-up or in the Bluff in Atlanta. This strategy certainly worked with the McCafe voyeur I had sitting across from me. He told me how he had gotten caught passing “some dude’s” counterfeit 100 dollar bill. He said the lady up front wouldn’t serve him food, because he “accidentally” tried to pass a fake bill for a cheeseburger with extra onions.
I liked this story and decided I could definitely help him out. At the very least, it was a smart story. There was no way, now, I was going to ask him for money. I don’t need a counterfeiting charge to go along with what I already got going on at the Department of Corrections. As I got up to go order, he said that he would watch my computer and bag for me, to make sure no one steals it. I guess he thought we were pretty good friends, but I did not think we were on that level yet. I packed up all my stuff to go make this order. I told him as I walked, bag in town, “Im sorry dude, but I dont know you.” It wasn’t long until my guy had finished his two cheeseburgers with extra onions, and I was back to writing. After I finished the story I was writing, I made my way over to Queen Bee’s house feeling successful.
After grazing over so many great holiday foods, I realized my phone was again at 3%. Oh no, I didn’t have a charger block with me, but I did have my computer. I went and retrieved my bag from my car and brought it in. I needed some electric juice; I had a person or two I needed to be talking to. I started digging through my bag; I just knew I would pull out my computer charger. This way I could charge my computer while it charged my phone. I didn’t see it in the main part. I started unzipping zippers I didn’t even know my bag had. Where was my charger?
I had been doing so good. I had not lost my charger in over a month. Sure the month prior to that, I had lost it three times. Sure, I had bought 2 new chargers only to find the lost one twice. Sure, I had to drive 30 minutes one way to buy and return the new one both times, but the key is that was last month. We are dealing with a completely new Bardin now. I’m not forgetful anymore; I’m an efficient world-smith now. There was no way I left it at the McCafe on Christmas Day.
After checking my bag about 4 times and exclaiming to my family that I was again losing my mind, I realized that I better hustle back to McCafe to find my charger. That charger powers my life, and precious minutes were being wasted.
I ran out the door and sped to my lifeline. Surely, the Lord would shine down favor on me. I was looking for a Christmas Miracle. I rolled in the curb in the parking lot and ran inside. I did not see my charger! Oh no, where could it be? I then began looking frantically; it was nowhere to be seen. There was no way it was on the other side of the store. My charger had walked off several times before, but it didn’t have legs. Then as I passed the final partition, I saw my Apple White cord laying on top of the back corner table. I looked around seeing if someone was playing a joke on me. There was no candid camera or Ashton Kutcher telling me how “Punkd” I was. It was just me. Some people would take losing their stuff as a defeat, but I do not. I see finding my lost stuff as a victory.
I was the lost sheep once and there was great celebration when I was found. I decided I should celebrate my charger being found. I put my charger above my head and began doing my best Rocky as I jumped up and down in a Christmas Miracle Celebration. No one was to be found to help me in my defeat, but in my victory people started showing up. I realized this when I was snapped out of my celebration by the gaze of 2 McCafe workers. I thought they may begin to celebrate with me. They did not. Their faces communicated more confusion than celebration.
Christmas 2019 was a fun day. It had its ups and downs just like every other day of my life. I won’t remember my defeats from the day but my victories. While others are busy drowning in defeat, I find it better to search for celebration in small, well-earned victories, even when these victories are brought on by prior defeat.
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